ella's hideaway

Rules: List of seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre. Whether or not they have words or even if they're any good, they must be the songs you enjoy right now. Post this instructions in your blog along with your 7 songs then tag 7 people and see what they are listening to.

Ito ang 7 kantang kung baga sa tao ay iniibig ko. Parang mas type ko ang mga kanta noon, mas meaningful at saka mas masarap pakinggan. Music talaga. O dahil mahilig lang ako sa luma. Try listening to these songs. I'm sure you will agree they are works of genius. I'm not tagging anyone.

1. Turn, Turn, Turn by the Byrds, lyrics are based on the Book of Ecclesiastes. It’s almost a religious experience, but it’s pure folk rock from the 60s.
2. Song for You by Leon Russel, from the 70s, one of the most romantic songs ever written.
3. If I Fell by the one and only Beatles. This is one of their old songs, meaning from their early years when Beatlemania ruled the world. Lennon-McCartney at their finest.
4. Losing My Religion from REM, from the 80s. Undefinable, it is both soft and hard at the same time.
5. Gold by Spandau Ballet, also from the 80s. A powerful message about believing in your soul.
6. Sweet Child o Mine by Guns ‘n Roses, again from the 80s, is one of the most overpowering rock and roll songs ever.
7. Never My Love by the Association at par with #2 as one of the most romantic songs of all time.

Magsisingit ako ng OPM, Ngayon at Kailan Man by Basil Valdez. Simply awesome!

I was invited by the Editor-in-Chief of Playboy Philippines to become an editor-at-large for the magazine which will be launched soon. The local version of the world’s number one men’s magazine will be different.

It promises to be a good read, and will have no full nudity. According to the EIC, it will celebrate the virtues and beauty of the modern Filipino woman (sakto katulad ng byuti ko nyahaha). In his words, it may not be what you expect, but will be more than what you want.

He also asked me to use my blog to help him look for or discover fresh talent. And I know napakaraming untapped talents sa blogosphere. Hala, pagkakataon na, guys! Eto ang mga hinahanap nila:

GRAPHIC ARTIST

The Philippine edition of Playboy magazine is looking for young graphic artist to do artwork for articles for the first issue which will be launched in April. Payment is per piece, at P3,000 for full page and P5,000 for spread. Payment is made on the month the issue comes out.

Artist must be a fast worker and will have to discuss the artwork with senior editors of the magazine.

FEMALE MODELS

Female models should be between 18 and 29 only, never appeared in other men’s magazines, possess clear complexion, have no tattoos and be properly proportioned. No full nudity is involved. A fee is given for centerfold and main pictorial models. Women must be of good moral character. Only those who send photos of themselves will be considered.

CARTOONISTS

Playboy is also looking for local cartoonists who specialize in single image drawings with or without caption. Sophisticated humor with a Filipino touch is a must. Images can be black and white or full color.

WRITERS

Writers who think they are good enough for Playboy are also considered, although all contributors for the maiden issue were invited. At least four of them are Palanca awardees. Pieces can be feature articles or fiction, and must appeal to the successful Filipino male.

Traditionally, Playboy caters to a mature market — 30 and up — who are interested in the finer things in life, but also have a strong interest on important issues. We, therefore, have stories that range from serious investigative pieces on political, business and social issues, to how-to articles/pictorials to food, entertainment, motoring, health, gadgets, fashion and the like. We also have fiction, having one or two short stories per issue.

Our rates are among the highest in the industry. The office is at Tektite west tower in the Ortigas business center, behind the San Miguel Corp HQ. No personal visits to the office unless invited.

Please send resume, photos and/or samples of work to ellarose.delossantos@gmail.com

Balik na naman tayo sa affairs of the heart. Lapit na kasi ang araw ng mga puso eh. Naisip ko kasi kung gaano karaming pera at gaano kahabang oras ang itinatapon ng mga babae sa pagpapaganda. Proof: BILLION dollar industries ang cosmetics, apparel, at cosmetic plastic surgery.

Why, oh why? Para kanino nagpapaganda ang mga babae? Para ba sa mga lalaki, para sa kapwa nila babae o para sa sarili nila? It is safe to assume na hindi naman lahat ay para sa lalaki. Kapag medyo bata pa, nag-aabala ‘yan para sa kapwa babae nila. Lalo na ‘yung mga teen-agers, dapat laging sunod sa what’s in. Baduy ka sa tingin ng peer group mo kapag hindi ka nakiuso. “Yuuuck! What she’s wearing is soooo last year!”

Kapag young adults na at on the look out na for prospective boyfriends, nagpapaganda na sila for the boys. Hindi na masyadong susunod sa uso. Ang mahalaga ay kung ano ang bagay sa kanila. What can bring their best assets out.

Kapag medyo nagka-edad na o may asawa na, you will spend for upkeep and maintenance . ‘Yan ang para sa sarili na lang. For self confidence, self esteem and making sure you are still attractive kay mahal.

Kung mag-aabala at magkakagastos kami para sa inyong mga lalaki, palagay ko it is important to know what kind of men you are. Like, are you a “boob man”, a leg man”, or a “butt man” (not typo, hindi Batman). ‘Yung mga parte ng mukha na nakaka-attract sa inyo is an entirely separate topic.

Nagagawan ng paraan ang mukha. Nandiyan si Dra. Vicky Belo and company. Pera lang ang katapat niyan. Mahilig ba kayo sa malamlam na mga mata? Ipa-deep set ‘yan! Konting gupit sa talukap and we’re done. Puwede ka nang mag-party sa gabi. Kahi’t nga ‘yung maitim, napapaputi eh. Look at Michael Jackson (Okey sorry, don’t look at MJ, an abomination, I know).

‘Yung mga ilong na puwede nang pag-landingan ng langaw? Taniman ng fake na buto ‘yan! Biglang tisay ang dating mo, ‘wag lang masyadong matangos at baka maduling ka naman. Mga kulubot? Iniksyunan ng lason ‘yan! Buhay ka pa, parang inimbalsamo na ‘yung mukha mo sa Botox hahaha! Look at Cher (okey, no looking at Cher either).

Meron ding mga orthodontists. Sungki-sungking ipin? Talian ng alambre ‘yan! But I really wonder how guys can kiss girls with retainers. Lasang bakal while french kissing! Eeeew!

Anyway, back to the impossible standards set by men. ‘Yan ang tunay na dahilan kung bakit saksakan ng yaman ang heir ng Max Factor (si Mr. Factor ba ‘yon?) Sa totoo lang, YOU guys make us feel inadequate! Bakit ang swimsuit edition ng Sports Illustrated ay isa sa pinakamabiling magazine sa buong mundo?

Don’t tell me gusto lang magbasa ng mga ads ng Nike ang mga lalaking bumibili nito. Jeez! Look at those maddening curves! Those glistening cleavages! Those long tanned, toned legs! Siyet, wala kami niyan, noh!

Sabi ng girlfriend ni TG, nakakabwisit daw sa lahat ‘yung kasama ka na, titingin pa sa ibang babaeng naka-mini o nakalabas na halos ang dede. Insultong malaki! Puwede na ‘yang grounds for annulment! Sasabihin naman ng mga boypren at asawa, “Masama bang tumingin?” Hello? You guys don’t have a clue! Mabuti pang sampalin ‘nyo na lang kami!

Now, let’s say you are a”boob” man. Puwede pa rin naming gawan ng paraan ‘yan kung kahit nag-plunge na hanggang pusod yung neckline namin eh wala pa ring cleavage. There are a lot of women who are willing to go under the knife for breast augmentation.

If you are a “butt” man, meron ding panagot diyan. Meron na ring butt implants, which I find extremely weird. If you are a”leg” man, patay na bata na kami kung nagkataong bukol-bukol na ‘yung binti namin, tadtad pa ng barya. Wala pa akong alam na babaeng nagpa-leg transplant dahil mukhang pamalo ng dalag ‘yung mga binti niya.

Don’t you see, guys, we’re willing to do anything for you, to spend a lot for you, to go under the knife for you (naks, ang lakas magpasakay ni Ella). Kahi’t pa sabihin ng ibang babae that they subscribe to the Calvinist ethic that “be satisfied, don’t go changing what God gave you”, gusto pa rin namin (kahit ayaw naming aminin) na kami ang pinakamagandang babae sa balat ng lupa para sa inyo.

Kaya mga kaibigan kong lalaki, takbo na at palihim na itapon sa basura ‘yung itinatabi-tabi ninyong poster ni Darna!